COUNSELLING BLOG

Posts tagged self help

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10 Things that can Wreck your Life

1. Not living in the moment. Always wishing you were somewhere else, doing something different with other people.

2. Blaming your problems on your past. Although the past affects us, it need not define us. We can choose, decide and act – and take control of our lives. Don’t let the heartache from the past define who you become.

3. Running away from problems. It’s crazy just to bury your head in the sand and act like are fine when you’re dealing with a mess. Face reality, take action and work to turn life round.

4. Being ungrateful. Being thankful sets you free in your heart and mind. It inspires all that’s good - and, also, oils relationships. But an ungrateful person will wear others down. It destroys your spirit, so you feel down and depressed.

5. Being angry and bitter. Refusing to forgive, and bearing grudges against others, will slowly poison your life and your personality. It’s much better to release them and to focus, instead, on living a happy and fulfilling life.

6. Letting your expectations rule your life. Life rarely goes smoothly and according to plan – and people disappoint us and let us down. Accepting this is normal takes some tension out of life.

7. Disrespecting yourself and others. Every single person deserves respect, and every single person is fighting their own battle. So focus on being kind, understanding and forgiving.

8. Neglecting important relationship. A relationship that’s built on unconditional love – where a person accepts us for who and what we are – is truly a gift and is worth fighting for. Don’t take it for granted – recognise that it’s a gift.

9. Loving people who are bad for us. Not every person will build into your life. Be aware of those who who’ll use you, or who want to bring you down, or who want to hurt you, or destroy your confidence.

10. Never taking risks. If you always play it safe, you’ll find you end up going nowhere. You must be ready to take risks - or you will miss so much in life.

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If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve to never ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather. Try to understand the blackness, lethargy, hopelessness, and loneliness they’re going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side.
It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it’s one of the kindest, noblest, and best things you’ll ever do.
Stephen Fry

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The Benefits of Mindfulness

1. It helps us to let go of the tiredness, stress and negativity that clutters up our mind. That then frees us to be still, and get in touch with our true self.

2. It helps us get in touch with our feelings and emotions - so we’re able to respond, and not simply react.

3. It helps us get in touch with our empathy - so we’re more able to listen, understand, connect and get inside the world of other people in our lives.

4. It keeps our focus on the present - so we’re not trapped by the past, or the pain and regret that can stop us moving on. Or, by concerns about the future, which haven’t happened yet!

5. It helps to keep us grounded in who we really are. That can increase our self confidence and self esteem, and we’re able to access and draw upon our strengths.

6. The body and mind are closely intertwined. Thus, if we’re careful to attend to our mental wellbeing it’s like to be good for our physical health, too.

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People to Avoid

1. People who use others, and are only interested in what they can get out of them

2. Whiners and complainers; people with a victim mentality who are always throwing a pity party

3. Those who are totally in love with themselves, and are always going on about how wonderful they are

4. People who are overly dependent (and are not getting help from a counsellor)

5. Habitual liars; anyone who is dishonest

6. The know it all

7. The total lazybones

8. People who are critical and mean-minded

9. Greedy people

10. Anyone with a criminal mind.

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