Posts tagged mental health

1. Pay attention to your posture. Stand straight, and don’t slouch.

2.  Smile.

3. Look people in the eyes. Averting your gaze or looking down at your feet sends the message that you’re feeling insecure.

4. Take your time - so you look more relaxed and ease with yourself, and with your ideas and decisions.

5.  Speak slowly, carefully and with self-belief. Don’t mumble or continually apologize for yourself.

6.  Accept compliments from others (don’t deflect them, or quickly brush them off).

7.  Dressing with confidence often helps us feel more confident about ourselves. Don’t be afraid to try new things, and to look as if you have a (positive) statement to make.

8. Be aware of your positive qualities and strengths. Keep reminding yourself that it is great to be you!

Social anxiety is the fear of social situations and the interaction with other people that can automatically bring on feelings of self-consciousness, judgment, evaluation, and inferiority.

Put another way, social anxiety is the fear and anxiety of being judged and evaluated negatively by other people, leading to feelings of inadequacy, embarrassment, humiliation, and depression. If a person usually becomes anxious in social situations, but seems fine when they are alone, then “social anxiety” may be the problem.

A specific social anxiety would be the fear of speaking in front of groups, whereas generalized social phobia indicates that the person is anxious, nervous, and uncomfortable in almost all social situations.

People with social anxiety disorder usually experience significant emotional distress in the following types of situations:

·  Being introduced to other people

·  Being teased or criticized

· Being the center of attention

· Being watched while doing something

· Meeting people in authority (“important people”)

· Most social encounters, especially with strangers

· Going around the room (or table) in a circle and having to say something

The physiological manifestations that accompany social anxiety may include intense fear, racing heart, turning red or blushing, excessive sweating, dry throat and mouth, trembling, swallowing with difficulty, and muscle twitches.

Constant, intense anxiety that does not go away is the most common feature.

People with social anxiety disorder know that their anxiety is irrational and does not make “head” sense. Nevertheless, “knowing” something is never the same thing as “believing” and “feeling” something. Thus, in people with social anxiety, thoughts and feelings of anxiety persist and show no signs of going away despite the fact that socially-anxious people “face their fears” every day of their lives.

Source: http://www.social-anxiety-network.com/define.html (abridged)

1.  I accept that I’m not perfect, and there’s no perfect time – Too many people are hanging around and waiting for the perfect opportunity – or the time when they are perfect and have all the skills they need. But life rewards effort; so get out there and work hard … and eventually you’ll find that you succeed and reach your goals.

2.  I can’t please everyone no matter how hard I try – No matter what you do or how hard you try there will always be someone who’s disgruntled or upset.  So, don’t look for affirmation; just do what you think’s right.

3. I will participate in something I believe in – It doesn’t really matter what activity you choose, as long as it is something that ignites your passion … as this will bring fulfilment and true meaning to your life.

4.  I will learn to prioritise and do what matters first – We all get distracted by what seems to be most urgent … or something that is fun and makes life less of a burden. But if you’re going to succeed you need to set priorities. Don’t allow what’s less important to distract you from your course.  

5.  I will be select when it comes to choosing friends – We’re influenced and shaped by the people we spend time with. Their impact is profound – even though this is subconscious. So be wise in who you choose to be your confidantes and friends. Surround yourself with people who inspire and motivate you.

6. I will be there for others, and will help them if I can – In life, we reap what we sow – and that’s a crucial principle. That means the more that you help others, the more they will help you.

7.  I will choose to focus on the positives – Our thoughts affect our feelings and the ways that we behave. If you don’t expect success then it’s likely you will fail – in your work, relationships and life in general. So listen to your self talk … and straighten out your thinking … and start to focus on the positives!  

8.  I will true to myself – You can’t be happy living someone else’s life. You need to discover and develop your own authentic self.That’s when you’re truly beautiful, and life feels meaningful.

9.  I will live in the present and enjoy the “now” – The past is gone and the future isn’t promised.  Life is happening in this moment, so cease the day and enjoy “now”.

10.  I will look for the good and be thankful for each day – Life is full of gifts, if we will only stop and notice. If we choose to be thankful, and treasure all life’s gifts, then we’ll find our lives are filled with joy and happiness – and the hurts and disappointments won’t weigh us down as much.

A common question asked of clinicians is, “What’s the difference between bipolar depression (also known as manic depression) and plain old depression? It’s a simple question to answer, because depression can either be a stand-alone diagnosis, or a part of another disorder, like bipolar. Therefore a mental health professional is going to examine whether there are other symptoms present (or have occurred in the past), to see if the depression is just depression, or whether it’s a part of a larger disorder.

Bipolar Includes Mania & Depression

If bipolar disorder includes a depressed mood, what else does bipolar include? We can find the answer to this question by looking at the old name for bipolar disorder, manic depression. The old name is pretty descriptive — bipolar is a combination of mania and depression, alternating in cycles.

What is mania? If we examine symptoms associated with mania, we see that it includes the following:

· Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity

· Decreased need for sleep (e.g., one feels rested after only 3 hours of sleep)

· More talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking

· Flight of ideas or subjective experience that thoughts are racing

· Attention is easily drawn to unimportant or irrelevant items

· Increase in goal-directed activity (either socially, at work or school, or sexually) or psychomotor agitation

· Excessive involvement in pleasurable activities that have a high potential for painful consequences (e.g., engaging in unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions, or foolish business investments)

If three or more of these symptoms are present, then a person is considered to have a “manic episode” (or, if it is of less severity and length, a “hypomanic episode”). A manic episode also needs to have lasted for at least a week (a hypomanic episode, just four days) in order to be diagnosed. If an individual has signs that suggest he or she is having or has had a manic or hypomanic episode, in addition to episodes of severe depression, then typically that individual will quality for a bipolar diagnosis.

Depression Has no Mania

In ordinary depression, which clinicians refer to as “major depression” (sorry, there’s no equivalent “minor depression”), no manic or hypomanic episode is prevalent and the individual has no record or indication of having a manic or hypomanic episode in the past. A depressive episode is characterized by the following symptoms:

· Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day

·  No interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day

· Significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day.

· Insomnia (inability to sleep) or hypersomnia (sleeping too much) nearly every day

· Psychomotor agitation or retardation nearly every day

· Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day

· Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt nearly every day

· Diminished ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day

· Recurrent thoughts of death (not just fear of dying), recurrent suicidal ideation without a specific plan, or a suicide attempt or a specific plan for committing suicide

Five or more of these symptoms for longer than two weeks are needed in order to qualify for a depressive diagnosis, with no accompanying manic episode.

Source: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2007/whats-the-difference-between-bipolar-disorder-and-depression/all/1/

The following questions will help you determine if you’re the type of person who becomes a victim.

1.    Do you tend to stay quiet in relationships instead of confidently asking for what you want?

2.    Do you feel inadequate on your own, and only feel worthwhile if you are part of a couple?

3.    Has a girlfriend or boyfriend, at some point in the past, been able to isolate you from your friends?

4.    Are you too much of a people pleaser?

5.    Do you desperately want and need to be loved?

6.    Do you bury and suppress your anger and resentment?

7.    Do you find it hard to say NO to others, and to set and maintain healthy boundaries?

8.    Would you describe yourself as being over-responsible?

9.    Do you struggle with feelings of false guilt and shame?

10. Do you desperately want to be noticed and affirmed?

11. Do you lose your unique self if in your relationships with others?

12. Do you find hard to disagree with others?

13. Are you the kind of person who takes care of others but doesn’t really take care of themselves?

14.  Do you give more than the other person in close relationships?

15. Are you always saying “sorry”; do you tend to assume that everything “bad” is your fault?

16. Are you a bit on the gullible side; are you easily taken in by others?

17. Do you allow other people to squash your spirit, and suffocate your creativity?

18. Do you tend to ignore that nagging inner voice and to blindly hope that everything will be OK?

19. In relationship, do you pretend that any problems “are no big deal” as you’d rather avoid them, than address them properly?

20. Do you tend to forgive too easily?

1. Talk to someone: Sharing how we feel helps to reduce the inner tension (but make sure it is someone who cares about your feelings).
2. Work on improving your self-esteem: Self-esteem is the way you see and feel about yourself … and there are lots of lots of things that undermine our self esteem. For example, experiencing a break up, putting on unwanted weight, doing badly on a test or being excluded by our friends. It’s important that we keep on working on our self-esteem by treating ourselves well and noticing when we succeed (instead of noticing the negatives).
3. Manage your stress levels: If we’re always feelings stressed then it’s hard to cope with life. We tend to over react and have a negative mind set … which drains us of our energy and saps our will to fight. So take a look at your lifestyle and see what you can drop. You may be doing too much, and don’t have time to relax.
4. Make the time and effort to enjoy yourself: Doing things that we enjoy helps to improve the way we feel. So build in little things like having coffee with a friend, or going to a game, or taking time to watch some sports.
5. Choose a healthy life style: Pay attention to your diet and how much you exercise; try to limit alcohol, and don’t deprive yourself of sleep.
6. Develop good relationships: Do your friends make you happy? Do you enjoy their company? Are they kind of people with your best interests at heart? Do they treat you with respect and help to boost your self-esteem? If not, then work on finding new relationships!

1. The Constant Victim - This kind of individual will always finds a way to end up as a victim in their relationships.

2. One-Upmanship Expert – This person uses put downs, snide remarks and criticisms, to show that they’re superior, and know much more than you.

3. Powerful Dependents – They hide behind the mask of being weak and powerless – then use their helplessness to dominate relationships. That is, they send the subtle message “you must not let me down.”

4. Triangulators – This person tries to get other people on their side. They’re quick to put you down, and to say some nasty things. They separate good friends or drive a wedge in families.

5. The Blasters – They blast you with their anger or they blow up suddenly. That stops you asking questions - in case there’s a showdown.

6. The Projector – This person thinks they’re perfect and others have the flaws. They take no ownership – because they’re never, ever wrong.  

7. The Deliberate Mis-Interpreter – They seem like a nice person – but they twist and use your words. They spread misinformation and misinterpret you. Thus, they deliberately present you in a false, negative way.

8. The Flirt – This person uses flirting to get their way in life. They want to be admired and to have an audience. However, your feelings and your needs are of no concern to them.

9. The Iron Fist – They use intimidation and throw their weight around, to use you for their ends, and to get their way in life.

10. The Multiple Offender – This person uses several of the techniques we’ve described – and they’ll often switch between them if it suits their purposes.