Posts tagged friends
Posts tagged friends
1. Talk about things that interest others, and not just things that interest you.
2. Share the conversation. Don’t talk over others, interrupt others, or seek to be the centre of attention.
3. Be interested in what other people have to say. Ask open questions, and try to find out more.
4. Notice when people do well, and make the effort to praise them for it. Try to be an affirming, and encouraging, friend.
5. Be respectful, considerate and polite. Be sensitive to the feelings of others.
6. Think before you speak. (Sometimes it’s better to say nothing than to speak your mind and upset or offend).
7. Learn how to ask for what you want and need in a non-threatening, and non-defensive way. Don’t react; and don’t pick needless arguments.
8. Try to understand the perspective of others – and don’t just assume that you are right and they are wrong.
9. Look out for others – and be a trusted friend
10. Back off, don’t dominate, and give your friends some space.
1. Don’t brag about what you’ve done or what you’ve got.
2. Don’t put others down.
3. Don’t judge and stereotype people.
4. Don’t take over the conversation. Let others tell their jokes, and have their say.
5. Don’t try to control other people, or to make them do what you want them to do.
6. Don’t talk, or gossip, about others.
7. Don’t make jokes at others’ expense.
8. Don’t demand perfection – allow your friends to be human, and to sometimes make mistakes.
9. Don’t be sensitive and quick to take offense.
10. Don’t be mean or stab others in the back.
1. Shared sense of humour; lots of laughter and fun
2. Little gestures of thoughtfulness
3. Personal space (there needs to be separateness in your togetherness)
4. Having the ability to spend hours together (simply doing routine or humdrum things)
5. Having “fairness and respect” rules in place for when you argue or fight
6. Having an attraction that goes beyond the physical; liking each other, and your personality
7. Believing that your partner has what it takes to live the life they want to live – believing in them always, especially when they’re down
8. Having a relationship that’s built on trust, openness, honesty and faithfulness.
1. Relationships aren’t about having another person satisfy or fulfil you. They’re about building each other up, and appreciating each other’s uniqueness - whilst also enjoying togetherness, and a degree of interdependency.
2. Although the first flush of love can blind you to their flaws, you need to see your partner for who they really are. That is, we all have our shortcoming, our weaknesses.
3. Be willing to learn and grow with your partner. Instead of being defensive, or demanding your own way, take the time to understand your partner’s perspective – and, hopefully, your partner will learn from you, as well.
4. Learn to appreciate solitude. We need to be comfortable being alone, and to accept and be at peace with the unique person we are, in order to be healthy in relationships.
5. When it comes to arguments, look for the real reasons why you fight and disagree. Often there’s a pattern to when and why we fight – which points to buried issues, to hurt and unmet needs.
6. Embrace the ordinary in your relationships. In time, the fairy-dust will settle and things will feel humdrum. But the day-to-day has meaning when it’s shared with those you love.
1. Listen to people when they’re talking; show an interest in what they have to say.
2. Make an effort to remember peoples’ names and use them the next time you meet them.
3. Follow up with people you are interested in staying in touch with. Call them up, send them an email or arrange to meet for a coffee or drink.
4. Treat everyone the same – act as if they are the most important person in the world (at least while you are talking to them).
5. Get involved in clubs and activities. Force yourself to go out and be with others.
6. In conversations, stick to safe topics before you know someone well. Don’t be quick to share your political or religious views, or to go on about your pet grievances.
7. Make sure you come across as someone who’s friendly the first time you meet someone new. Greet them warmly, smile, share your name and ask them theirs.
8. Be aware of other peoples’ culture and be sensitive to any potential differences. You don’t want to offend other people – either deliberately or inadvertently. The goal is to be seen as a person who is friendly, respectful and warm.
9. Don’t rush your interactions with people as that sends the message that you’re not interested in them, or what they have to say.
10. Don’t be false – just be your normal self. People would prefer to find out who you are.