1. The client feels valued and unconditionally accepted. They can tell that the counselor is for them, and sees them as unique.
2. The counselor is warm and genuine.
3. The counselor creates an environment of safety and trust. Thus, the client can say what is on their mind, without the fear of being criticized or judged.
4. The counselor conveys empathy and understanding. They really seem to grasp what it’s like for the client.
5. The counselor is affirming, supportive and empowering. They help the client grow and change in positive ways.
6. The counseling or therapy is non-pathologizing. (So the person’s not the problem; the problem is the problem!)
7. The counselor works collaboratively with the client. Each person plays a role and contributes to the process.
8. The counselor brings direction and focus to the sessions. He or she maintains control, and can contain powerful emotions.
9. The counselor helps the client grow in insight and knowledge. They help them understand themselves, and their problems, much better.
10. The counselor’s is not afraid of exploring painful feelings, or to go beneath the surface – so the real problem’s addressed.