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How to Become Better at Connecting with Others

1. Treat acquaintances and strangers the way you would a friend. When you first meet someone, do what you can to develop a rapport. For example, ask yourself “How would I treat this person if I wanted us to be great friends” That way, you’re more likely to warm, friendly, respectful, generous, amusing.

2. Add something positive to their day. Try to make people feel better about themselves. For example, smile, be interested in whatever interests them, make a lot of their successes, comment positively on what they are wearing.

3. Try to find common ground. Everyone has at least few things in common (school, exams, music, films, favourite TV shows, places you’ve visited, favourite sports teams etc). And the faster you find that common ground the easier it is to relate to the person.

4. Pay attention. The best way to appear interesting is to be interested in the other person. Focus on what they’re saying, ask open questions, encourage them to “tell their story” and they and match their level of emotion. (For example, if they seem excitement then mirror that excitement.)

5. Share your interests and passions with them. It’s hard to connect with an individual who seems to have no interests – or doesn’t talk about them. If you live with passion you’ll connect with passion and the conversation is more likely to flow.

6. Tell stories. Facts and information don’t convey energy, or unleash emotions, or get conversations going. But sharing funny stories, or memorable events encourages the listener to share their story, too.

7. Be grateful. Everybody loves being appreciated. It sends the message that their actions and intentions have been noticed. It’s a harsh world out there - so decide to be the person who builds others up, so they feel good about themselves.

Filed under counselling psychology therapy relationships self help self improvement self confidence self esteem communication skills social skills success online counselling college

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    1. Treat acquaintances and strangers the way you would a friend. When you first meet someone, do what you can to develop...
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