1. Try to face, and come to terms with, the fact that he or she doesn’t love you the way you love them. Unless you are able to reach this place, you won’t be able to move on with your life.
2. If possible, try to understand the reasons why. For example, perhaps they don’t want a relationship with anyone at the moment; perhaps they are in love with someone else …
3. Try to remain positive and optimistic about love. Don’t allow this experience to make you bitter and cynical. Instead, turn your attention to finding someone who will love you for “you”, and who will treat you well.
4. Make a concerted effort to get your mind off of him or her. Throw yourself into your hobbies; work hard at school or college; surround yourself with friends whose company you enjoy.
5. Stay busy. Don’t sit around waiting for him or her to call, or agonising over the pain you are feeling. Don’t feed the monster!
6. Remind yourself of all your strengths and positive attributes. Remind yourself of all the people who love and value you, and who want to hang out, and spend time, with you. Make a list of all the good things others have said about you. Work on being secure in yourself as an individual (as you don’t need a relationship to be a worthwhile person.)
7. Remind yourself that breakups and unrequited love are fairly common experiences. It doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you - or that you’ll never find true love.
8. Although it may feel fake at first, go on dates with other people. You may actually enjoy yourself – and perhaps you’ll find someone else to fall in love with.
9. If this has happened before, think of what you did to cope with that pain previously. Try doing the same things again. Remind yourself that grief and pain lessens, and life goes on.
10. Ask yourself why you want to be in a relationship with someone who didn’t love you the way you love them. You deserve more than that – and there’s a good chance that you can have more than that. Is it a pattern from your childhood? Perhaps you were abandoned or unloved by a parent? If appropriate, look into getting professional help.